Thu, 10 Apr 2003

Dear Mr. Wonderful,

Why does the Herald need to Hark when the angels sing?

What does harking involve, for that matter?

Yours Truly,

Father Xmas

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Dear Horned One,

Harking? I'm not sure, but I think I did it in a taxicab during one long weekend in Nevada.

Mister Wonderful certainly knows his Christmas Carols, yes, but his Christmas Janes and Christmas Susans ain't bad, neither. Once we had a Lazy Susan, but Mister Dark turned her in the cupboard. He would have turned her into salt, but we don't hold with all that Jahwist nonsense. Which brings me to your query...

I don't think it's the Herald that harks. I think the "Herald Angels" sing "Glory to the &c.," and we're supposed to pay attention. "Look, over there! Winged Monsters with trumpets yodeling about the Messiah!" You know, "Hark!" as in, "Gadzooks!" or, "Well, Blow Me Sideways In A Clown Car!"

By the by, I hear the Herald Angels look good for the Stanley Cup next year.

Miss Yakamoto, bless her mercy mild, has a soft spot for the way we look at language. Mister Malice has a talent for discovering the soft spot at the top of children's heads. Especially at Christmas, when he haunts the malls in his elf suit. One big harky family.

Now, I know what you're thinking, and I am a stunning case of arrested development, but then again, my development never had a proper defense lawyer.

WONDERFUL LABS - We May Be Late, But We'll Always Be There. Which Will Then Be Here, Now. You Know What We Mean.

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