Wed, 07 Aug 2002
Dear Mister Wonderful,
Do you have a sign up over the entrance to your labs, like the McDonald's Golden Arches, only a W and in black gothic letters, about how many billions and billions you have served?
Oh, ho, ho, ho. No. It's too easy. Thank you, but no.
I think I was sharing peyote milkshakes with Jack Kerouac at the Speedee McDonald's on Lakewood Blvd. in Downey, CA when it struck me that karma is not mystical hooey, but only the application of cause and effect, furthermore, all things are one, interchangeable elements of the universal body, so all divisions are illusion no matter what the perception of the mind.
"Hey," I said to the author of On The Road, "I don't owe you five bucks, you owe me five bucks."
The sign over the entrance to Wonderful Laboratories has changed over the years, but the wrought-iron intertwined "MW" DNA-strand Conjugal Lemniscate has been in place since 1485. Below, we have hung a variety of "welcoming" messages, including:
* Nil Ilegitimati Carborundum
* Creo Quia Absurdum Est
* Ye Olde Wysdom While-U-Wait Shoppe
* 100% Plague Free
* Speak-Easy To The Stars
* You Must Be This Tall To Ride Mr. Wonderful
* Closed For Love-In
* Ass, Gas, or Grass - No One Is Enlightened For Free
* Tuesdays Are Ladies' Nights - $2.00 You-Call-Em
* If This Laboratory Is A-Rockin, Alert The Authorities
And then there were the days that Mister Dark indulged his "enemies' heads on pikes" motif. Which, as you might well imagine, wreaked havoc with the neighborhood dogs.
Do stop by, as we always hope to have something surprising going on.