Thu, 09 Jan 2003

Dear Mister Wonderful,

I recently went to a concert at the Universal Amphitheater with a friend of mine, and the Fanta company was there promoting their product with a band that they had obviously contrived, called the "Fantanas". My friend seemed to finally catch on to why I loathe the concept of corporate propaganda, even though he didn't see it while we walked around the mall that is Universal Citywalk.

Is there some way that we can help people identify the fact that corporate propaganda is so prominent in our society that it has become transparent to the average person? Don't people see this stuff in the movies and on t-shirts and in music, and cringe as much as I do? I think the only organization that seems to be fighting it is the staff of Matt Groening, but that's about it. What can we do?


Just Stop It, aka Got AntiPropaganda?



You know what's really prominent? The icy hipbones of Lee Lee, Raquel, Calli, and Nina - your ladies of The Fantanas. Does no one feed these women? I suppose they're only allowed to drink those fruity sodas - that's how the company gets the girls to taste like the flavors they represent.

Raquel is the grape one. David Bowie told me.

Actually, that's not true. The girls just dress in different colors to look like Fanta flavors. They taste like they do because they're all daughters of the original "Fruit of the Loom" guys.

Hey, if the Fantanas were created by the Coca-Cola Corporation to multi-culturally push sugar water, does that mean the Spice Girls were put together by House Atreides to control Arrakis... Desert Planet... Dune? "Bene Gesserit Power! I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really really really really Gom Jab Ba!"


In any case, corporate propaganda is surely more palatable than the old national propaganda. At least marking yourself with the tribe of Nike doesn't mean you're going to go hurt anyone. Aside from the thousands of malnourished children working around the clock to keep you in fashionable aglets. But, again, you're not hurting them with a gun, and you don't have to see it, so it doesn't really count under U.S. law, does it?

Listen: You can't pull people out of adverculture all at once any more than you can command the fish to foxtrot outta the oceans. If Aquaman tried that with his piscine friends there'd be much embarrassing flopping on the floor of the Hall of Justice, let me tell you. Most folk aren't equipped to breathe outside the logo-sphere. You've got to have patience, and hang with those who are willing to give the evolution thing a try. Does Aquaman's telepathy work on amphibians? What about Sea Otters? These sorts of questions keep me up at night, which is another reason Miss Yakamoto has been giving me those glares lately.

WONDERFUL LABS - Three Men and A Little Deadly

Mister Wonderful Recommends: Science! And the fact that Gary Mitchell did not die in vain.

Located in beautiful Balboa Park at 1875 El Prado, two blocks south of the San Diego Zoo on Park Boulevard, the Fleet Science Center is a nonprofit educational organization dedicated to realizing a San Diego where everyone is connected to the power of science.

“According to Dr Irwin, something odd happened about 10 billion years ago.”